The Next Thing on the List
by KricketWilliams
Summary: The Sequel to "The List." Morgan and Garcia are a couple; now what happens? Sexy, with some angst, and a lot of love. As always, I don't own a thing.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

_AN: Thank you for reading the sequel to "The List."…In a nutshell: a little spice, a lot of learning, a little angst, and a lot of love.. Probably will be updating a little slower than usual..._

Derek Morgan loved his baby girl. Without a doubt, the woman was the most special, most life-changing force in his world. She was the best, the most perfect, the sexiest woman ever created just for him. She was a dream come true; a kind, beautiful angel…

Who currently had him handcuffed to his kitchen chair. Naked.

She was humming, naked, rummaging in the refrigerator. She was terribly off-key. The woman couldn't carry a tune to save her life. He was watching her sweet round butt sticking up in the air while she reached to the back of one of the shelves.

"I've almost got it," she said, making a little _oomph_ noise for her effort.

"Ah, baby girl?" he questioned, suddenly thinking a little about self-preservation. "You know; cold doesn't do the same things for me as it does for you."

"Oh, no Ben and Jerry's®, hot stuff," she said, laughing. "Been there, done that." She reached behind her and placed a jar on the table. "Now this. This is new."

"What the hell is that?" Derek said, staring at the tub of chocolaty looking goop. It had the consistency of a cross between gelatin and pudding, with a dark brown chocolate color.

Oh, boy. His baby girl had been cooking again. Penelope made things that were very tasty almost always, but usually _looked _awful. She made him dinner one night to surprise him. He sat down to an odd, red-colored pile of stuff. It was tasty, very Italian, but he still didn't have a clue what it was he ate.

"It's hot fudge, honey. I made it," she said, stating the obvious. Not the hot fudge part, that wasn't obvious. No, no one in their right mind would've guessed that was hot fudge. "And I know what cold does, so I thought, _Let's heat it up a bit, shall we?"_

She wandered over to the microwave and stuck the container in. She was humming again, that same happy little tune from before.

He smiled. She was damn creative. His happy parts were happy, too. He didn't want to deal with ice cold stuff where it didn't need to be. He cringed at the thought.

While they were waiting, he had to ask the question. "Who gave you the handcuffs, honey?"

"JJ," she said. "She felt awful about misjudging you-"

"She didn't, really." He grinned his most rakish grin. "I was what she thought: a complete ladies' man. Still am, but only to one lady."

He heard the bell on the microwave, then the door opening. "That's true, my cute little soon to be covered with chocolate Adonis."

It actually smelled heavenly. He couldn't help wondering what it tasted like. She smelled wonderful, too; his mouth salivated thinking about her.

They made love.

A long while later, she reached around, undid the handcuffs, and rose to her feet. She gave him a soft kiss.

He reached his arms around her and pulled her into his lap. "You are incredible, woman. I love you."

"You better," she teased, giving him another kiss.

"We're at three months, you know. You said we'd end this after three months," he said. "I need to talk you into staying."

"Try to get rid of me; I dare you."

"No, baby," he said, smiling at her. "I _really_ want to talk you into staying. Here. I want you here. Permanently."

Her heart swelled in her chest. "Derek, what-"

"Move in with me," he said, kissing her again. "I can't stand bringing you home one more Sunday night. It's killing me."

She smiled wistfully. She didn't think he was going ask her that, but it was good anyway. "I hate going, too."

"Then it's a deal?" He looked so hopefully at her, she couldn't say no, even if she wanted to. And she didn't want to say no at all.

"Deal."

**Please see my profile if you want more of this chapter!**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

_AN: Thanks for the reviews as always.... movin' on to the next step..._

Penelope began the moving process the next weekend. She called her landlord to break the news. He nearly cried when she said she was leaving. She was there nearly six years and never had a single complaint about anyone there. Nobody ever complained about her, either. She lived a happy little existence there for a long time.

Well, she did have one issue, one massive issue. Three years ago, she was shot in the courtyard by Jason Battle. That was a real whopper, but the landlord didn't blame her. Instead, he was absolutely upset and wanted to make things better for her and future clients. Actually, Derek helped Mr. Goodwin with finding the best surveillance and lighting system. He conquered and really beefed up security.

All in all, she was going to miss her purple palace. She had a lot of great times there, a lot of fantastic memories. Very many of those memories contained Morgan. Almost all the good she had there involved him. Still, she was ready to move on and in with Derek. She wasn't at her place very much anymore. His house is where she felt at home.

It took her two weekends total to pack. She didn't realize exactly how much clutter and crap one person could accumulate in about six years of a life. She boxed up everything with JJ and Emily. Derek tried to help, bless his heart, but he was horrible at organizing and packing.

"Honey, no," she said, grabbing the blank programming CDs out of his hands. "That does not go there."

He frowned. "It said _computer box _on the side. Computer stuff should go there."

"Honey, the computer _itself_ is going in there. The box that says Hardware/Software is where that goes."

"Really, what is the difference?" he questioned, obviously not understanding. "It all goes to the same place."

That ended Derek's involvement in packing.

It was moving day for her. The team came along to help. It was all going according to plan. Prentiss, Penelope and JJ had boxes, Hotch had a table, and Derek and Reid had the couch.

Rossi was directing traffic and being damned annoying to everyone there. Truth be told, he pulled a back muscle on vacation skiing in Vale. He still wanted to help, but couldn't lift over five pounds.

"Angle it to the left, boys," he barked out, moving his hands in a gesture showing them what to do. "It'll get through the door."

Morgan and Reid were doing their best not to pull their guns to shoot Rossi.

"Here," Hotch said, handing Rossi a throw pillow. He smirked. "Carry this out; it should be light enough for you, Dave."

"Oh, kick a man when he's down, Hotchner!" Rossi said, clutching the pillow to his chest as if mortally wounded. He gave him the evil eye. "I'll remember that."

"Stop fighting," JJ said, scowling at them in mock sternness. "We have work to do."

"Yes, ma'am," they said in unison, then started moving things out again.

It took the majority of the day to get it all out, but everything did eventually make it's way over to Derek's house. On the way over, she wondered where all her stuff would fit. He already had a houseful of stuff, beautiful stuff she loved. She didn't know where she'd put any of her items.

When they walked in the door, Derek's house was empty. There was nothing but bare floors. She was speechless. "Where'd everything go?"

Her hot and sweaty hot stuff wrapped his arms around her. He worked his ass off today; obviously he did last night, too. "I moved things out so we could see what we want to keep and what needed to go."

"I love your stuff, Derek; I really do," she said. Her heart felt so full. He didn't need to do that, but she was so glad he did.

"I love your stuff, too," he said, kissing the tip of her nose. He put his hand under her chin. "I want you to know how much I want you here. Everything; including all the things that make you who you are."

"Aww, sweetness," she said, raising on her tiptoes to give him a kiss. He moved his hands up to cup her head, deepening the kiss.

"Ah, Morgan?"

They pulled apart to see Reid standing there, looking both embarrassed and impatient. Reid wanted this moving business to be over; he complained numerous times about being hungry earlier.

"The more expediently we can get this done, the-"

"I know," Derek said, shaking his head. "The faster we eat."

Derek gave her one more quick kiss, then walked out with Reid to start lifting heavy things again.  
　  
Seven PM rolled around and the last box was brought into the house. Although they snacked and had sandwiches earlier, it was finally time for the crew to really chow down. They worked up a huge appetite and Penelope wanted to treat everyone for their kindness in helping.

She decided to order pizzas for everyone. She started with one with anchovies for Rossi. He salivated when the box arrived. The rest of the crew looked on in disgust as he ate one fishy slice after another.

Reid got a multiple meat topped pizza. He didn't seem to chew; he inhaled the pizza. It never ceased to amaze her how someone so skinny could eat so much.

Prentiss ate Canadian bacon and pineapple with Penelope; they loved the sweet and salty taste. Normally, they would have shared with JJ, but both she and Hotch declined. It was late; JJ had to get home to Henry and Will, and Hotch needed to get Jack from his sister-in-law's.

Derek was off returning the moving van. Before he left, he gave Reid a stern warning to save some of the pizza for him. Penelope thought better of it and ordered Derek his own separate pizza. He was grateful when he came back, since Reid only left one slice of the other pizza.

"Where the hell do you put it?" Prentiss asked, shaking her head at Reid.

"Actually, I don't 'put it' anywhere different than you do." He picked up the last slice and took a bite.

Prentiss scoffed. "You should weigh half a ton."

"I have a seriously high metabolism," Reid said defensively, scarfing down the last of his slice. "Plus, I utilized mega kilocalories when exerting-"

"Hey!" Derek interrupted, glancing at the empty box, then glaring at Reid. "You're _very _lucky my girl ordered an extra, kid."

"Nonsense. You would've been fine," Rossi said, smirking. "There's always plenty of anchovy left."

It was nearly nine when everyone left. In the end, they chose his couch, his massive bed, her armchair, her kitchen table and chairs. The last items were a battle: his kitchen chairs had memories attached to them, after all. He also argued her chairs didn't have the right kind of slats for him to use properly.

Looking over everything, they were rather proud of how it all came together. It ended up being an eclectic blend of things that seemed to work together beautifully.

_Kind of like us_, Penelope thought, looking at the love of her life.

He was going through a box when he glanced over at her. He sensed her looking at him. He always knew, she didn't have a clue how he did that. He wandered over and pulled her into his arms. "Tired?"

"Very," she said. She leaned into his shirt, then leaned back. She wrinkled her nose. "You're still wet and sweaty."

He grinned. "It was hard earned, woman. So let's hit the shower."

She smiled. "I'll wash your back."

He wiggled his eyebrows, "I'll wash your front; it makes me happy." He pulled off his wet shirt first, then wrapped her tightly into his arms. "Actually, all of you makes me happy."

They headed down the hall, hand in hand.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

AN: Thanks again for the reviews. Keeps me typing like a mad woman! :).....

The third weekend after they moved in was exactly how Derek wanted it to be. There wasn't a lot of unpacking to do. They did that during the two weeks prior. Most of the stuff was already unboxed and set where they planned. This weekend was going to be a rest weekend, planning basically nothing.

Derek started Friday night, doing exactly what he planned on doing for a long time. He came home from work, had a dinner of some tasty rice thing P made. After, they played cards; she completely trounced him. This was not a problem in his book; he wasn't competitive in those sorts of things. They took a shower, made love and slept.

He found it really remarkable he slept so well with Penelope. He was a habitual insomniac until she came into his life. In the beginning, he used to think it was because he was tired out from making love. They would make love all damn night, then literally pass out. He was wasted but very happy the next day.

She'd go home on Sunday and his insomnia would come back. During the week, he'd be up, trying to get some rest. He failed miserably, until Friday rolled around. The weekends she was there, he slept like the dead, regardless if they made love or not. She called herself his _miracle sleeping pill_. She even felt so bad for him, she would come over in the middle of the week, just so he could get some sleep.

Now she was there every night and he slept like a rock. He averaged six hours a night. That was absolutely unheard of before she came around. There was just something about holding his woman that did it for him. He was content, relaxed, happy. And today, he did something he never did.

He slept in.

He woke up in the empty bed and sat up. He was a little disoriented. The bright sunlight was streaming in, nearly blinding him with the intensity. He looked at the clock. It was noon.

"Damn," he muttered, rubbing his eyes and crawling out of bed. He slept _twelve_ hours. No wonder Pen left him in bed. He shook his head, heading towards the shower.

He felt much better after he was showered and dressed. Nothing woke him up more than a shower and coffee. Coffee wasn't going to cut it this morning. His stomach was growling; after last night's activities, he seriously needed some food. He stopped in the kitchen, poured himself a massive bowl of cereal, then went investigating to find Penelope and see what her plan was for the rest of the day.

It didn't take long to find her. Derek heard the distinct sound of typing coming from the other room. It was a rather loud, thundering typing. When his baby girl was getting into whatever she was doing, she did it with gusto. He wandered in and watched over her shoulder.

"Whatcha doing?"

"Ah!" she said, turning and raising her eyebrows over her red frames. "Sleeping beauty has decided to join the living."

He scowled and took a big bite of his corn flakes.

She giggled, then pursed her lips for a kiss. He complied, then she smiled. "It's _Wondoorworld_. It's an on-line fantasy game. That's me."

She pointed to an elf with blonde hair, brown eyes, wearing a colorful pink outfit.

Derek made a face. "She doesn't look anything like you."

Pen pouted. "She pretty, and she-"

"You're prettier," he said, then added with a devilish grin, "and she has no rack and no ass at all. _That_ is not my baby girl."

She blushed with pleasure. Of course he'd notice that on her avatar. Being with him for nearly four months, she learned quickly Derek liked curves. _Really_ liked curves. In particular, he liked breasts…large, perfect, round breasts. He'd go on and on about them.

"How I managed to be around you in low cut shirts for five years and not do a damn thing was a miracle," he said, his eyes darkening. "Drove me to distraction so many times."

"You drove me crazy, too, you beautifully sculpted person, you," she said, smiling. "Anyway, I have too much in the _curves _department."

"Uh-uh," he said in a tone that brooked no argument. "Soft, sweet curves in all the right places."

She smiled and started to type again.

He was scowling at the screen. "Who the hell is that guy?"

Another elf with green skin and long blonde hair like Legolas in Lord of the Rings was offering her character flowers.

_Flowers for m'lady? _The words on the screen asked.

She was excited; this was big points in this game. "Oh! That is so sweet. This is wonderful." She was getting ready to type her response.

"Tell him to take his flowers and shove them up his green ass."

She looked over her shoulder where her lover was standing. He looked irritated. She giggled. "Honey, it's a computer player, not a hunky elf. Probably some nerd in Japan who looks nothing like that."

Derek raised an eyebrow. "You think he's cute?"

She grinned. "You jealous?"

He scoffed. "Please. Like that blonde fruitcake has anything on me."

She smiled at him; he wasn't admitting it, but he was jealous. She turned back to the keyboard. She was going to lose major points, but she didn't care. It was going to be worth it.

_Kind sir, take said flowers and sticketh them where the sun does not shineth. _

Derek burst out laughing, she logged off the computer, and they spent the rest of the day, just hanging out.

* * *

Sunday evening, Derek was on the phone while Penelope was painting her toenails on the couch. He was talking to his mother. It was funny. Derek's mom called every Sunday, and he would walk around the kitchen, answering mostly "Yep" and "Nope" to a barrage of questions Fran would ask. He would graze the whole time, opening cabinets and the fridge to find something to nosh on.

It was a nervous habit. She knew that right away. She didn't know why he'd be nervous talking to his mother. She was the nicest woman on the planet. She would always talk to Derek first for a good long time, then she'd speak to Penelope after. It was coming around to the time when he would hand her the phone.

"Penelope," he said, as if on cue. "It's Momma."

Derek handed her the phone and made a beeline to the gym in the basement. She figured he had to burn off the ten thousand calories he ate while on the phone. He would be doomed if she called every night.

"Hi there," she said brightly.

"Penelope, sweetheart, how are you? Is that son of mine treating you right?"

"Of course, I wouldn't let him treat me any other way."

"Well, he can be a hard head, sometimes," Fran said in a leading fashion.

Penelope didn't want to get in the middle of his relationship with his mother. Still, she needed to answer truthfully. "Yes, he can be stubborn."

It was all the leeway his mother needed. "For instance, I want him to come to Chicago this summer, but he wants to stay there."

She sounded so despondent and she was such a nice lady. Pen didn't think she could let her down. "How about I talk to him and maybe we'll both be there this summer?"

Fran squealed with glee. There was no doubt; _squealed_ was the right word. "I can't wait! Oh, I am so excited. I have to set up-"

Penelope laughed at her exuberance. "Hold on; I still have to ask!"

"You're persuasive. My son would deny you nothing." Fran giggled. "At least he better not, if he knows what's good for him."

"True," she said. "It's pretty much a done deal. I'll talk to him, okay?"

"That's good. Love you, dear," she said, hanging up the phone.

It was remarkable how well received she was by Derek's family. She met his sister Sarah when she flew into town a month ago and they hit it off like fast friends. His mother ended every phone conversation that way, saying she loved her. She had no doubt of the other woman's sincerity, and she'd never even met her in person yet.

She was a touch nervous now after she was done with the conversation. She pretty much promised the woman she hoped would be her mother-in-law someday they would be heading to Chicago this summer. She hoped Derek wouldn't be too mad; it was presumptuous of her, but she couldn't help trying to make it better.

She headed to the basement to tell Derek about their travel plans. She opened the door to the exercise room. There she found her boyfriend hanging upside down on a bar like a bat in a cave. He was doing some sort of curl up stomach exercise that made her tummy hurt just looking at it. It was fun to watch him, though. He wasn't wearing a shirt; she simply loved to watch his muscles move….

_Snap out of it_, she told herself. _You have work to do_.

"Derek," she said.

He swung down from the bar to stand near her. He grinned at her, but that ended quickly when he looked at her face. "What's the matter, angel?"

"Your mom wants you to go to Chicago this summer. I think you should go." She wasn't lying. She did think he needed to go visit his mom. He did every year; it was only fair.

"Okay," he said, looking somewhat confused. "Why do you look so worried about it?"

"Because I kind of invited myself and kind of told her we'd be going."

"You better have invited yourself," he said with a smile. "I'm not going anywhere without you this summer."

She felt relieved. "You're okay with this?"

"Of course," he stated; there was obviously no question in his mind. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"I kind of made the decision without even asking you."

He gave her a teasing grin. "No _kind of _about it, honey. You did."

"Chicago is nice," she said softly, changing the subject.

"Yeah," he said with that same grin, then started walking back to his bar. "But so is Hawaii or Barbados or Puerto Rico or-"

She gaped at him, then was rather irritated. "You were making those kind of plans and you didn't tell me? Derek, you have to tell me. If I would've known-"

Her voice trailed off because he was absolutely beaming at her.

She realized she was just set up. "Fine… Fine. I will refrain from setting up any plans in the future." She turned to leave the room, but he caught her around her waist, pulling her into his arms.

"Honey, plan away. Honestly. You should know; _you_ are my plans for the foreseeable future," he said, touching the tip of her nose. "That's all that really matters."

He started kissing her and soon all thoughts of leaving and his workout were completely forgotten.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

_AN: Thanks for the reviews; will answer as soon as I can. Posting this first, an itty bitty road block in happiness. Nothing too serious. All will play out soon, and for certain a HEA (Don't believe in anything else!)...._

For Penelope, life couldn't be any more perfect than it was right now. She was laying on her boyfriend's lap, watching TV while he played with her hair. He had sort of an obsession with her hair. He liked to pick up a curl, twirl it around his fingers, then release it, only to start all over again.

It was the start of the third month of them living together. Everyday they went to work together, every evening they cuddled and relaxed. Every night, they made passionate love. It was a very good existence.

They were watching this ridiculous sitcom, something they did a lot. They would watch just about anything on television that came on. She wasn't fussy about what she saw and Derek said he was happy simply to be near her. She felt the same way; she just melted into him. They were like one person.

Something was kind of off tonight, though. Penelope laughed over a slapstick thing that happened. Usually Derek was the one who cracked up over physical comedy like that. Curiosity got the best of her; she looked up at him.

Derek was frowning a little, just staring at the sitcom they were watching. He normally never frowned or groused; it wasn't in his nature.

"Sweetheart, what's wrong?" she asked, looking up.

"Nothing, really," he said with half of a smile.

She was getting a little irritated with that answer. He said that two weeks ago when he looked upset over something and she asked that same question. She loved the man, but he was very close mouthed when he had a problem. She didn't want to press the issue, she figured he would eventually tell her what she wanted to know. Still, she wished he'd talk to her, purely because she didn't like to see him upset.

She didn't know why it bothered her so much more he was quiet about problems, now that they were living together. It was always like that with Derek for their entire friendship. He rarely spoke about those kind of issues with her. She didn't like it before, but now it really struck a chord in her.

She did not suffer with such problems. It was the polar opposite of him; she had verbal diarrhea. She always let him know, and usually about five other people, exactly what was bothering her. Derek, on the other hand, kept everything inside. He hid it with a grin and some sort of comment that made her laugh.

She was learning he hid it with sex, too. When he was upset, he would make love to her like he was starved for her. All through the night, he would love her tenderly, showing exactly how he felt in each stroke. It would bring tears to her eyes, the amount of emotion he put into making love.

She knew tonight was going to be like that. It was written on his face; something was bugging him. She wanted so badly for him to just tell her, so she could take away some of the pain, in more than merely the bedroom. She knew it was against his nature to just let it out.

However, he was worth the effort, worth the fight, to make him talk to her. "Honey, it must be something."

He grinned down at her, touched the tip of her nose. "Nothing I can't handle, angel."

"I have no doubt about that, hot stuff," she said, sitting up to meet his eyes. "Nonetheless, that doesn't mean I can't help."

He pulled her into his lap. "Baby, it ain't nothing you have to worry about, okay?"

He started to kiss the side of her neck, moving over to her ear. His hands started roaming up her back, and she could feel his erection swelling under her hip. A moment later, haunted dark eyes pleaded, just before his mouth captured hers.

She sighed and lost herself in his kisses. She wasn't going to be able to win this one tonight.

* * *

It happened again, a few times, in the next two weeks. Derek would either disappear downstairs for a long part of the night, or would just give her that same spiel about how she didn't have to worry. She really hated it; she wished he'd realize that only made her worry more.

There was nothing she could do about it now; he had a case out of town. It was the first time he was gone more than a couple of days since they moved in together. They were going on a week apart and it was killing her. She missed him so much; the house was so quiet when he wasn't there.

It was late and now she couldn't sleep. She smiled; he was her _miracle_ _sleeping pill_, too. She did what she used to do in her apartment; she sat down at her computer. She tried some programming, searched online, but for some reason, it didn't appeal to her at all.

She looked to the other side of the room where Derek's computer was. It was calling like a beacon to her, saying _Come look at me. _

She knew she shouldn't do it. He didn't profile her; she shouldn't hack his computer. On the other hand, she was starving for information. She wanted so badly for him to talk to her, he wasn't doing it and she needed to help.

Maybe in those files, she'd find an answer to his problems.

She turned it on and let it warm up. Her palms were sweating, she was so nervous about this, but instead of stopping, she shook it off. It was for his own good, what she was going to do.

The screen came on with the password protect. She smiled; he had the easiest security system she ever laid eyes on. She was going to have to beef this up for him. This was so elementary, anyone with half a brain could hack into it. Within ten seconds, she had his password.

"Aww," she said, her heart warming as she typed it in. _Penelope7_. She smiled even more when she looked at his password history. All _Penelope1_ through _7_. He had used the same thing for seven months now, from well before they were even dating.

"Oh, sweet cheeks. You really have loved me forever," she said, her eyes misting.

She scanned his files. There was nothing exciting that popped up. He was financially stable, he had good social contacts, nothing drew her eye. She looked at the entertainment aspects. He had his fitness things, movie things, stuff like that. Nothing that pointed to any issues whatsoever.

She giggled. He had the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue on there, too. He visited that quite a few times; she could see his hit history. It came out before they dated and truly she didn't care. She was surprised not to find anything kinkier.

Then again, Derek worked for the FBI and probably knew the issues behind internet porn. She wouldn't recommend any government employee go there!

She looked at the pictures he had. Nothing exciting there. There were a few of the old girlfriends he used to have. Some, oh my, some were naked pictures. She didn't really like seeing that. She supposed it was his history, and-

Against her better judgment, she was getting a little miffed. She didn't have naked pictures of Kevin on her computer. Heck, she ditched almost all the pictures she had of Kevin; she didn't need them anymore. Why was he keeping pictures of these bimbos?

She calmed back down, after all it was history and he was hers now. Until she saw one name that popped up again in his recent email interactions. Nadine. He had Nadine in a bikini, not naked, but she was in his pictures. He sent her an email about two weeks ago, too. Who the hell was she? She wished she could find a last name.

She started to search frantically through his computer for the name. She couldn't pull up the email, although she tried. His system was incredibly slow in comparison to hers. She tried to speed it up, to find that damn correspondence, but it took forever. It seemed to be lost in _Yahoo! _Backlogs. Tears came to her eyes as she typed furiously. She wanted to know, she had to know what-

"Oh, God." She blanched at what she was doing. She stopped typing and shut down Derek's computer quickly. She felt sick to her stomach. She went on his computer to help him, not to snoop in his past affairs. She felt really awful; not for anything that he had on his computer, but for what she did.

He was never on the computer, as far as she saw him. He logged on three times in the three months they were together. His personal email had messages from a month ago that he hadn't opened yet.

She needed to trust Derek, trust in how much he loved her. One look at him and there was no doubt how he felt. She just needed to have faith in him. She truly did trust him and she loved him with all her heart.

As if on cue, her cell phone buzzed and blinked, showing a new text message. Only one person would text or call her at ten after midnight.

_R U awake still? In field office wrapping up._

He must be surrounded by people, hence the text instead of the call. She smiled and wrote back._ Poor baby._  
_  
Wish u were here_

_If I were, what would u do with me? _she texted.

She snickered. It was taking him awhile to answer that one! The phone beeped and she looked.

_B doing u on this desk instead of paperwork _

She clapped her hand on her mouth and laughed, then texted back, _That was worth the wait. Goodnite_

_Luv u baby girl, _he answered.

She walked back to their bed, crawled in and held his pillow, wishing it were him. However, before she rested, she did think one thing: Next time he told her not to worry, she was going to take him up on it.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter five

_AN: As always, thanks for the reviews. It has been really strange tonight; they are not showing up in email. So sorry; I will answer when they show..._

Penelope was so excited, she could barely stand herself. She couldn't stop moving. Any minute, her hot stuff was going to coming through that door. It had been a miserably long week without him. She missed him just being around to laugh with; the phone wasn't cutting it anymore at all.

He called from the plane, saying they'd be landing in three hours. That was three and a half hours ago. He was due. She made something for dinner… chicken enchiladas. She glanced at the oven. It didn't really _look_ like chicken enchiladas, but it was tasty. She tried a bite to test it.

She was sitting on the couch, watching the front door. She glanced down at her flouncy white skirt and was glad there were no enchilada sauce marks on it. She changed outfits three times, trying to look her best for him. She ended up wearing the same thing she originally put on.

She was a touch nervous. She knew she didn't have to be so nervous, but she couldn't help herself. They talked on the phone, he flirted like usual, acted like he usually did on the phone, but she could tell he was anxious, too. It was the longest they'd been apart since they moved in together.

The front door opened and he walked in. He barely had a foot in the door before she launched herself into his arms. At nearly the same time, he began kissing her like he was starved and she was the only sustenance for miles and miles. He kicked the door shut with his foot, lifted her off the ground, and wandered towards the bedroom, never breaking the kiss.

"I…missed…you," she said. Each word was punctuated with a kiss.

He didn't say a damn thing; he was too busy kissing her.

"I made….dinner," she said, managing to get two words out that time before a kiss.

"Woman," he said very seriously. "You _are_ dinner."

She giggled. "Put me down. Dinner first, then we play."

He sighed, but let her slide down his body. "Okay. You win. I love you, you know."

"Yes, I know," she said with a smile, walking to the kitchen.

"I love you more than anything on this God forsaken planet," he said, wrapping his arms around her while she stood at the sink. "You know that, right?"

"Mmm hmm," she said, reaching for plates.

"And I missed you. I missed you so much." He kissed the side of her neck. "Damn, girl, how I missed you."

She shivered in his arms, then stepped away. "Dinner, mister."

They sat down and ate. It was a good dinner, just chatting, but there was a definite edge beneath it. She would catch his hot eyes looking at her, and she knew she was looking back the same way at him.

She took one more bite. "It's not working, is it?"

"Hell, no."

"It's delicious, though, right?" she began, pausing on purpose.

He smiled. "Oh, hell yes."

She put on her most society perfect innocent smile. "But it would be so much better if we got this tension out of the way so we could enjoy our meal."

She barely had a second to think before he pounced. He had a wolfish grin, scooped her up, and took off at a trot to the bedroom.

They made love.

**Please see my profile if you want more of this chapter!**


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

_AN: Thanks as always for the reviews; you folks really make my day! We get a few things cleared up here...._

Derek woke the next morning content, his arms wrapped around his still sleeping baby girl. He was glad to be home, a week was far too long to be away from his girl. She was so cute: naked, sleep rumpled, her mouth curved in a little smile. He could easily wake up like this every day for the rest of his life and he'd be an extremely happy man.

He thought about what he was thinking there and it made him smile even more. In his entire life, Derek never even dreamed about forever with any woman until Penelope. Now, it was a constant reoccurring thought. He never, ever wanted to let her go. She mattered to him more than life itself. He thought about the passion between them and the obvious love, then he thought about her comment to JJ about wanting a "million of his babies." He'd be happy to start on that any time now.

He didn't want to push her, though. They were only dating six months. He didn't want to rush her into anything, but he was going to marry her. No doubt about it. It was a done deal; he knew it. They loved each other madly.

But not right now.

A few of his friends thought he should pop the question and marry her right away. "I have never seen a man so disgustingly in love," Allen, his friend from college, said.

Even his mother thought he was crazy. "She's wonderful, Derek. What are you waiting for?"

However, he knew exactly why he was waiting. Life right now was too complicated. He was getting more and more pressure from Strauss to do more. She was pressing him to make a move upward. It was flattering, but he wasn't going to do it. He didn't have to, either, thanks to Hotch putting his own ass on the line.

Hotch fought like hell for his team to remain intact. He was willing to go the line against anybody that threatened their unity. He reassured Derek that Strauss would let up after awhile.

"Strauss would rather have you here than out of the FBI, I can assure you of that." Hotch gave him one of his rare smiles. "Unlike me, she actually seems to _like_ you."

Also, it paid to have someone like David Rossi on his side. Being one of the founders of the unit, the brass nearly genuflected at the sight of him.  
"You're not going anywhere unless you want to," Dave said, clasping a hand on Derek's shoulder. "You have my word on that, _capice_?"

After all was said and done, he was sure he wasn't moving on. He knew that was a blessing and he was grateful. However, that didn't mean the brass wouldn't dump the worst of the worst on him. They seemed to really be relishing making his life miserable.

The current thing he was working on was prepping files for the new cold case unit that was opening. Derek was going through unsolved back files of things that made his stomach churn. The cases he looked into were horrible, brutal cases. That was why they were flagged of interest in the first place.

Every one of the cases was a compulsive crime. That was how Strauss got away with giving this duty to Morgan alone. He specialized in compulsive crimes; his expertise was needed in each case. He was doing good work at it, too. Still, he almost wished he didn't specialize in anything at this point.

So now, when he wasn't on a case, his job was truly dismal. Reid and Prentiss helped him do a lot with sorting, but he didn't like leaning on them either. It was his arena, his area of knowledge; therefore, it was his job. His load to carry.

He thought about Penelope; she noticed something was off. He tried to not let it show, but sometimes he didn't succeed. Still, he wasn't going to burden her with things she couldn't really do anything about. Besides, she didn't need that shit in her life either. It wasn't that big of an issue; he could handle the mind drumming boredom and the twisted crap. He didn't need to dump it on her.

So now, instead of making any life changes, he was riding this storm out. During this time, all he wanted was to come home to her, relax and laugh. He didn't want to talk about it, or think about it. He wanted to just hold his girl, watch the play of emotions on her face, and sink into her tight wet heat so he could forget for awhile.

* * *

Penelope was back in the online land of _Wondoorworld. _

_  
_Derek came behind her and rubbed her shoulders. "Damn elf isn't hanging around, is he?"

"No," she said, giving him a mock stern look. "In fact, I haven't had any suitors since I told him to stick it."

"Good," he said, kissing the top of her head. "Otherwise I may have to come online and rearrange some elf ears."

She giggled. "You're crazy."

Derek smiled, then sat at his computer. He logged on and pulled up his email. She glanced over her shoulder and saw the first of twelve new messages. _Campbell, Nadine._  
_  
__Nadine_…that name from when she hacked. She should just let it fly, but she couldn't do it. Beyond her better judgment, she strained her eyes a little more to see what that was about.

She stopped herself, blanching a bit at what she was doing. She was going to trust him. He never gave her reason to doubt him in the entire time she knew him. She didn't know who this Nadine was, but she needed to have faith in Derek. He loved her and only her. Curiosity was killing her, but it was her own fault for snooping in the first place.

One second later, she was richly rewarded.

"Baby girl, come over here," he said. He clicked on the Nadine email and then a picture link. An adorable little boy came up on the screen.

"He's very cute," she said, then asked the logical question. "Who is he?"

"He's my Godson in Chicago."

She smiled to herself; she was right to have faith in him. Whatever Nadine was, it was history. She knew she was never going to hack into his account again.

He looked at her with curiosity. "Baby, you okay?"

"I'm good."

"His mom is my cousin, Nadine. I set her up with a friend from school, they got married and made me Godfather. I tried to talk them out of it," he beamed at her wickedly. "I'm a damn heathen and you know it."

She smiled to herself. He was no heathen, except for in the bedroom, of course! Truly, he was a very, very good man. She sat on his lap and gave him an enormous kiss.

He quirked a brow, looking somewhat confused. "Not that I'm complaining, but what was that for?"

"For being wonderful," she said, with a soft smile. "Even if you are a heathen."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

_AN: More everyday life for our pair. As always, thanks for the reviews! Will answer tomorrow; heading to bed early tonight!_  
　  
They were in a tangle of arms and legs, laying in their bed one Thursday night. There was a bunch of giggling going on, along with some throaty laughter and downright chuckling. It was a long day. She was giving him little kisses, encouraging him. He was pretending to be a lump, laying flat on his back.

"Woman, I am done for. You're killing me. Look at me," he said, gesturing down his naked body. "I'm laying here like a wet noodle because of you."

"You like it and you know it."

"Limp. Listless. Completely spent." He lifted his arm and let it fall with a thump on the mattress, for dramatic effect.

She rolled her eyes. "Please."

"Seriously," he said. "I couldn't do a thing anymore. I'm wrung out."

She raised her eyebrows at him. "Really?"

"Really. In fact," he said, sighing. "Nothing could change my mind."

He threw the gauntlet. She knew it; he was baiting her, but she didn't mind. She didn't suffer because of it!

She grinned wickedly and leaned over him. "I bet I can change that quickly." She kissed his jaw, his ear, the side of his neck. Her hand rested on his tummy, her fingertips playing with the definition there.

"Nope. Not a thing," he lied. She could tell; his pulse was beating stronger and certain parts of his body under the sheet were twitching a little.

"Oh, that's too bad. Guess I'll have to take care of my problem myself, then." She laid down on her side next to him with an exaggerated pout. She removed her hand from his tummy and brought it up to fondle her breast.

She had to fight a smile. She knew he was getting turned on. It worked every time she touched herself. She didn't quite understand the appeal, but she didn't really care. She'd put on a show, if it was called for, and smile at his hot reaction. She licked her lips and watched the heat in his eyes grow to pure flames.

She teased her nipple, then slid her hand down over her belly. His eyes narrowed to glittering chocolate slits.

She tsked with an impish grin. "Yes, that's really, _really_ too bad."

"Come here, you," he said, pulling her over on top of him, proving that she could always win in that arena.

* * *

　  
It was Friday, they planned on staying in. They did most every Friday since they moved in together. It seemed like the thing to do and usually it was perfect. However, the team was going to the bar and invited them.

They were all standing in the parking lot, having a quick planning huddle before they headed over to their hangout.

"How about it, Garcia?" Prentiss asked.

Penelope looked over at Derek. "I don't know. Honey?"

"Do you want to go?" he asked, pulling her into his arms.

Rossi rolled his eyes. "Alright, you two. Spit it out; which is it?"

Derek looked at Penelope, then said, "No. We have plans for tonight."

"Okay, guys," JJ said. "See you Monday."

He thought he made the right decision. It was their usual movie night and Penelope might have had something planned for dinner. She didn't seem that interested, either. He thought Penelope didn't feel like going.

He was wrong.

During dinner, she was very twitchy, bouncing her knee under the table. Then after on the couch, she was fidgeting with her pen, while she was trying to write something down. She was full of restless energy; it was damn adorable.

He sighed, took the crossword puzzle book out of her hand and the pen. "Okay. Let's go."

She didn't even question it. She just popped up to her feet like a champagne cork out of a bottle. "Oooh!" She started heading towards the bedroom.

He smiled as he watched her, then she stopped and turned.

She gave him a look, obviously feeling kind of bad for such enthusiasm after he made the opposite decision. "However, we don't have to if you want to stay home...."

"No," he said, standing, walking a little closer and pulling her into his arms. "I was thinking it would be fun to be out with everyone. Besides, I want to take my girl dancing."

She squealed and giggled. "Yes!" She kissed his lips and ran into the bathroom.

He laughed. It didn't take Pen very long to get ready. She was remarkably quick, unlike any other woman he dated. She also was eager to go, so she probably rushed it a bit. He was in the right clothes, his jeans and a good shirt, so he was set to go, too.

It was a nice evening, so they decided to take his motorcycle out. It was a massive thing Penelope loved to ride on. He fired it up, she climbed on the back, and they took off like a bat out of hell down the road. She wrapped her arms around his waist and put her cheek against his back, enjoying the ride. Almost too soon, they were at the bar.

She fixed her hair in the cycle's mirror. Her cheeks were windblown and her eyes sparkly. "Look okay?"

"Beautiful," he said, leaning down to kiss her lips. He put his arm around her, and they walked into the bar.

Everyone else was still there. They laughed and relaxed, it was like every other Friday when the team went out. There was a lot of fun playing darts and shooting pool. He flirted with Penelope, too, like he always did.

The only thing different was this time, Penelope danced with him. Holding his woman close on the dance floor, her arms draped over his shoulders, his hands on her waist, there was no better feeling in the world. Well, almost no better feeling, but that couldn't be done in public.

He put his cheek next to hers and murmured softly. "Now aren't you sad you didn't dance with me years ago?"

She simply said, "Yes."

He leaned back and smiled at her. She reached her hands up to the back of his neck, playing with the skin there. He leaned down and kissed her. He slid his hands down her back, onto her bottom to press her closer, and forgot about the world for awhile. It happened every time he kissed her; he completely lost himself in her.

She was so damn sweet and just made for him. Every curve, every fiber of her just meshed with him. His lips played with hers, his tongue teased intermittently. He kept kissing her over and over, purely because he had to. He'd never get enough of her; it was the one certainty of his life.

They were still swaying, still kissing, when a hand tapped them. He lifted his head to look.

"Music stopped," some other patron said, trying to hide his laugh.

They both were wide eyed at getting so carried away. No wonder they stayed home so many weekends. Maybe they weren't ready for the general public yet! He glanced over at the table where the team was sitting. They were hiding obvious snickers. He merely grinned over at them and pulled his pink faced Penelope into his side.

They sat down and nobody said a thing for a moment. He was rather grateful for it, but knew it was a temporary reprieve. The calm before the storm, so to speak. JJ started gently. "Nice of you two to join us again."

"I was wondering when you'd surface," Hotch added with a barely concealed smirk.

Prentiss was more blunt. "Good Lord! Get a room. Don't you ever get enough?"

"Oh! I believe I know the answer to that."

"It was rhetorical, Reid," Prentiss said with disgust.

Rossi smiled. "Been there, done that." He winked at Penelope, which just made her blush more.

Derek smiled, leaned down and kissed her again, this time a soft, sweet kiss. "They can tease me all they want. I'm in love with you and I don't care who knows it."

She smiled at him, sat down at the table, and held his hand. Then they joined in the rest of the conversation the table was having.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

_AN: Thank you for the reviews. Another look, but this one not so positive. Morgan mentioned he had nightmares back in season one..._

"Honey, will you hand me that sock?"

Again he didn't hear her. Penelope had to ask Derek the same thing for the fourth time. They were in the bedroom, folding clothes, but he was obviously somewhere else today.

It was Saturday; he looked exhausted. He didn't sleep well, but then neither did she.

They were at the bar with their friends last night, then they took a motorcycle ride for a bit. They came home, made love and fell asleep with him holding her like he always did. It was fantastic, they had a great time and ended the evening on a high note.

Then it happened. For the first time since she moved in, he woke up in the middle of the night with a gasp. He sat straight up, sweating, shaking, breathing heavy.

She sat next to him and wrapped her arms around him. She held him close to her, trying to take some of whatever was bothering him. "Baby, I got you," she murmured, holding him tight.

His arms wrapped around her in a fierce hug, like she was his lifeline. He was stiff, still shaking. He took a few deep breaths through his nose; she could feel his ribcage expand with the effort. A long while later, she felt his tense body shudder, like he was done fighting whatever it was.

"I'm sorry," he choked out, his voice hoarse. He released her enough to look at her. His dark eyes were somehow vulnerable and young. "I didn't mean to wake you."

"I don't mind," she said softly, her hands rubbing his back gently. She felt him grow tense again.

"I have to get up," he said, letting her go completely.

She still held on to him, her arms around his waist. She pressed her cheek against his cold, damp chest. She could hear his heart beating so rapidly; the speed of his pulse was frightening her.

"Derek, please, what is wrong?" She was pleading with him; she needed to help him. This was insane, she couldn't watch him suffer.

"Baby…I'm okay." He seemed restless. He put his hands on her arms in an effort to loosen them.

"No, Derek, you're not," she said, trying to hold tighter. "Please tell me, and-"

"Just leave it, P," he said shortly, pushing her arms away.

She stared at him, her eyes filling with tears. She swallowed hard. "Okay."

He looked like he wanted to say something, like he was fighting himself. Instead, he stood up, pulled on his boxers and walked out of the room.

She didn't know where he went. She tried to sleep, but it was no use. She went investigating. He wasn't on the couch; she thought he might be lying there. She looked in the guest room- no Derek. Finally, she glanced downstairs; the workout room had a light on and she could hear the clank of weights. She looked at the clock, it was four AM.

She was very worried, very angry and very hurt. Whatever it was, he should talk to her. She'd try to make it better, she'd do anything to help him. Didn't he understand that? She didn't like seeing him in pain. Emotionally drained and exhausted, she went to bed. There she had no solace; it was a fitful, horrible sleep.

In the morning, he brought her breakfast in bed: warm croissant, hot coffee and strawberries. He put a rose on the tray, too. It was a very sincere apology, she could tell he was trying.

She looked up into the saddest pleading warm chocolate eyes. "I am so sorry, baby. I shouldn't... I... Shit!" He ran his hand over his face and sat next to her on the bed. "You are everything to me. I didn't mean to hurt you. I just lost it. I-"

"It's okay," she said, sincerely forgiving him. "It was awful; I could tell. You can't help what you dream."

He smiled, which morphed into a grin. "Usually I just dream about you. A sexy naked you. That's the best kind of dreams, sweetheart."

He was doing it again, changing the subject through sex and humor. He was very good at avoiding talking- too good.

She looked at him again, not smiling, continuing to press. "Derek, you have to tell me what's wrong."

"Just work things, honey," he said, sounding frustrated. He sighed and stood up. "No big thing. I can handle it."

"Not if it's keeping you up at night!" She got out of bed and wrapped her arms around him. Her voice quavered with unshed tears. "Please, Derek, let me help you. I'd do anything. I want to make it better."

He held her and kissed her lips, taking just a second to breathe deeply. He held her chin and looked into her eyes.

"You are _making it better_," he said, using her same tone. Normally it would make her smile, but it sounded like a mockery to her this morning. "Just by being you and being here. Honest, baby girl; that's all I need."

She pulled out of his arms and stiffened, feeling very disappointed. She glanced at his determined face. No matter what she said, she wasn't going to change anything. She was used to losing this fight.

"Okay. I'm glad. I have laundry to do." She took a basket and went downstairs, her breakfast forgotten.

That lead to where she was right now, folding socks and being worried about the love of her life. She was growing more determined. She needed to do something, she just didn't know what. How was she going to get him to open up to her, before he closed every part of himself off?

She sighed, reached for the sock he finally handed her, and kept folding.

* * *

Penelope was sitting in her office, working like the devil trying to catch up. It was one of those really busy days, the kind where she didn't have time to even go to the bathroom, much less eat lunch or talk.

"Hey," a voice from the doorway said.

She turned to see Marc standing there, holding a tray with two sandwiches, chips and pop. She smiled. It was a nice gesture. He was a pretty good friend now. She wondered in the beginning if that was going to be possible. He was so ardent when he proclaimed he was falling in love with her, she thought any relationship with him would be a disaster.

Derek set him straight that day. After he knew she was dating Derek, he was so apologetic for hitting on her it was almost embarrassing to be around him for awhile. He would see her, his handsome face would become beet red.

He flustered and floundered, saying, "I'm so sorry! I didn't know. You're just really nice... oh geez, P. I would hate it if I lost your friendship because... oh man."

She put him out of his misery immediately. "It's okay, Marc. You're a good guy. I know."

After that, all was good. He asked a lot of questions, but was willing to help out as much as he could most of the time. He was always very grateful for the help he got from her. He always thought he owed her.

"Hey yourself, cutie," she said, watching Marc turn pleasantly pink. He got her sense of humor now and relished in it.

"I knew you were really busy with what you had, so I thought I'd bring lunch to you."

"Oh, that was nice," she said, smiling.

He smiled hopefully at her. "And maybe some lunch company for fifteen minutes?"

She gestured to the chair. "Cop a squat."

They talked about the computer programs that they were currently fixing, about systems analysis, and about what an arrogant ass Kevin Lynch was.

"Man thinks he has everyone's GUI blown out of the water," Marc mused. He grinned. "Except yours. He doesn't say a damn thing about yours."

"He knows not to mess with the goddess, Marc," she said. "He's an ass, but he's no fool."

"If he let you go, he was a fool."

"Marc," she said, looking at him warningly.

He paled and began to explain. "No, no. I know you're in love with Agent Morgan! Heck, I have Becky now and we're happy." He blushed. "I was just stating a fact."

"How is Beck?" She took a bite of her sandwich.

He glowed. "Oh, she's incredible; we communicate on the best level. She knows my dreams, P."

Penelope winced. She didn't even know Derek's nightmares.

"Every day I thank God for her," he said with a grin. "How 'bout you and Agent Morgan? How are things going?"

"Oh, fine." Her smile faded a little; she decided to try a man's point of view for help. "How does Becky get you to talk?"

"I'm a talker." He popped a chip in his mouth. "Just am."

"Do you let her help you with your problems?"

"Of course," he said, biting his sandwich. He looked up at her and his eyebrows grew knit. "Penelope, what's going on?"

"Nothing really, I'm okay," she said, then laughed. "Man, I sound like Derek!"

Marc laid his sandwich on the plate. "Oh, I see." He put his hand on hers and squeezed. "Some men have a hard time talking; it's okay. He'll open up eventually."

Her eyes watered, even though she didn't want them to. "I don't think Derek trusts me enough to talk to me. I know he loves me, but he...I don't know."

She couldn't finish what she was saying. Her heart clenched, but she stifled it. She didn't want to talk about their problems at work anyway.

Marc was very perceptive. "Penelope... I'm a friend; nothing will leave here. Hacker's oath!" He put his hand up in the Vulcan salute.

She laughed. He was indeed a good friend. "Thanks."

He reached over and gave her a hug. It was a very comforting gesture. She sighed, and felt better, until...

"Okay. I warned you to stay away from her," a deep voice said from the doorway. She turned to look at Derek, who looked and sounded remarkably calm. "You didn't listen. Now you're a dead man."

Penelope and Marc stood up immediately. She stepped in front of Marc and glared at Derek. "That is not nice, Morgan! He's just a friend."

He took a few steps forward and stood next to her. He was obviously very irritated. "Baby Girl, friends do not grope you."

She turned to look at Marc. "Please leave, okay?"

Intelligent man that he was, he hightailed it out the door.

She turned, barely constrained rage on her face. "Mister, we need to talk."

_AN: In this case, Derek experiences strong nightmares. Flight or Fight instincts and adrenaline is coursing through his system. Sweat, rapid pulse, anxiety. He needs to move, to run. I thought it was fitting to have a profiler with his history have something that strong happen to him._


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

_AN: I am going to be out this evening, so I am posting this early. Gets much, much better, I promise... but this story really needed this..._

Derek knew it the second before Penelope said they needed to talk. His stomach plummeting and the icy fingers creeping down his back confirmed his suspicions. He was dead wrong; he _knew_ he was dead wrong before he even spoke. Still, he let his jealous, hot head speak for him, not his brain.

He wasn't the kind that tried to hide when he made a mistake. However, this was going to take gentle persuasion. He wanted her to know how sorry he was for overreacting.

He took a deep breath. "Sweetheart, I-"

"Don't you _dare_ sweetheart me, Derek Morgan." The look on her face stopped any ability to answer. He never saw his baby girl so angry before in his life.

Oh shit. His gut started to churn. This was bad; very, very bad.

"We need to talk, but not now," she said, glaring at him. "Tonight, when we get home."

She turned and sat, starting to type furiously on her computer. Derek wisely didn't say another word. He just turned and left the office, like a dog with his tail between his legs.

* * *

Penelope didn't know she could be as angry as she was right now. Her head ached, her heart was sore, she felt like hell. She was able to go home before Derek, which was a blessing. She was able to prepare and ready herself for what she knew was going to be a very hard conversation.

She left late due to being so busy, but Derek was leaving later. He left late almost every night now. She wasn't going to worry about it anymore; he wasn't going to tell her about it, anyway. She sat on the couch. How could a man who made love to her with passion and love, who made her feel like a million dollars almost always, not trust her enough to talk to her?

The door opened and he walked in. He looked so tired, it broke her heart. He smiled at her softly. "Hi."

A lot of the anger dissipated and her heart ached for him. The love she felt for him just bounded through her. She felt so sorry for him; she just wanted to hold him and make it better.

Then she thought for a minute: he wouldn't let her make it better.

"Are you ready to talk?" she said, but gently. This was not a time to scream and shout.

He sat down next to her on the couch and sighed heavily. "Now is as good a time as any."

"I know-"

"I screwed up," he quickly interrupted. His remaining words were flat. "I saw him, got pissed and just attacked without thinking. I'm an idiot; I know it." He grinned crookedly. "I'm not always rational when I see you with another man."

She pleaded, "You need to have faith in me, Derek."

"I _do_ have faith in you," he said, his eyes warm. "It's _him_ I have no faith in."

Now she was angry again. "If you had faith in me, you wouldn't say that. You do not trust me."

He scowled. "Yes I do. I love you."

She sighed. "I know you love me. I have absolutely no doubt in the world that you love me."

"Then what the hell is the matter?"

"You don't _trust_ me. It's like you want me around, but you won't say a word about anything that matters to you." Her eyes watered, she swallowed back tears. "I'm still just your friend."

"You're so much more than that," he said, pulling her into his arms. "You're my life. Woman, you have to know that."

She looked up at him. "Then let me in, sweetheart. Tell me when something is going wrong." She laughed, but it was mirthless. "I am tired of snooping around, trying to find out what is wrong with you. Hotch and Reid know more about your problems than I do."

He looked truly confused. "What do you mean, snooping around? You don't have to snoop, I-"

"I hacked your computer," she said guiltily. "I hacked it and I felt like hell afterward. I saw pictures of naked girlfriends and thought the worst things-"

"I haven't trashed them, never got around to it. They were my black book women from before you, honey; they don't mean anything," he looked at her with such solemn eyes. "Honest, baby, I would never-"

"I know that, angel fish." She smiled; he was so earnest, it was sweet. "You hadn't looked at most of them for over a year and none since we made our list agreement. But that's not-"

"Now I just need naked pictures of you in there, and life would be very good." He grinned wolfishly. "I'd sure as hell spend more time on the computer."

She started to giggle, but then she sobered quickly. "Derek, you're doing it again."

"What?" He looked confused.

"When you don't want to talk, you crack a joke, or kiss me, or go workout." She sighed with exasperation. "You don't share with me."

"Bullshit. I share my whole life with you." He looked miffed; there was an obvious lack of understanding.

"Derek, that's why I hacked in the first place. I wanted to know about you." She started to tear up again. "I shouldn't have to sneak around to know there's something wrong."

"Baby girl…..damn." He sighed, leaned his elbows on his knees and put his face in his hands. A moment later, he looked up. "I don't see the reason you need to worry about dumb shit in my life. It's not important."

"It's important enough to keep you up at night."

He sighed, bit the insides of his cheeks and shook his head. "Honey, no. It's nothing. I can handle it."

"Fine," she said, standing up. She reached to the other side of the couch and grabbed her bag she had prepared earlier.

His jaw dropped. "What the hell are you doing?" He was incredulous and very angry now.

"Until you can share your life with me, until you can see that I want to make you happy too." She walked past him to the door, he followed, "Until I am more than a roommate to have sex with when you get the urge, I'm leaving."

"This is ridiculous. Sit your ass on that couch."

"No." She made it to the threshold.

"You know I love you." He started to panic; she could see it in his eyes. He reached for her arm. "Don't do this."

"I love you, too. I always will." She opened the door. "That's why I can't sit by and do nothing while you suffer."

"I'll talk," he said, so quickly it lacked substance. "Please, just stay. I'll say whatever you want."

"No," she said, giving him a bittersweet smile that didn't meet her glistening eyes. "You won't."

"Stay."

She turned and left.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten

_AN: Thanks for the reviews, everyone. Sorry so late; out with hubby dancing tonight (Story fodder.. hee hee). As for the story: Now, we're getting there....._

_AN2: Dedicated to my friend, Harley, who always makes me think of happily ever after. Happy Birthday, honey._

Derek was miserable. She'd left three hours ago and he still couldn't move off the couch. He didn't know what the hell to do. The whole thing shell shocked him. That woman, the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with, walked out on him. Not because she didn't think he loved her. She knew he loved her. She loved him, too. And she still head ached. All he wanted to do was protect her; why didn't she understand? It wasn't something she could do anything about. He didn't see the need to trouble her. It really wasn't that important. Besides, he could handle-

_It's important enough to keep you up at night._

He sighed. She was right. It was eating at him like nothing else had in a long time. However, he was right, too. Just being with her helped. Just holding her, making love to her, it all helped. She made him happy. She said she wanted to make him happy, and she did. Still, she was gone.

_Until you can share your life with me._

He scowled, feeling frustrated. He thought he _did_ share his life with her. She was the one thing that mattered in his world, the one thing he loved more than anything. She knew every like and dislike he had, knew what kind of boxers he wore, knew the flavor of toothpaste he liked. What didn't he share? Crap that would bother her?

He was going to do something he didn't like to do with personal relationships ever. It was bad karma when he did it, bit him on the ass one too many times. He was going to profile the situation, get into her mind, put himself in her shoes. He told her he wouldn't profile her a long time ago, but she said she'd never hack his computer, either.

He smiled a little. Honestly, he should be pissed about her hacking, but he wasn't. He really thought that was kind of cute. He thought of how clever her fantastic mind was, thinking of solutions. She was a brilliant woman. Sexy and brilliant.

It only took a minute for him to frown a little. She must've felt awful having to go against what she believed in, like he did thinking of profiling her. She had a good strong set of moral standards, professional standards that she would never want to breech. Yet she did it to try and help him.

He put himself in her shoes, thinking of how he would feel if he couldn't help her. He remembered during their list days, how desperate he felt when she was in pain. He came home, she made love to him, crying the whole time.

He didn't know what was bothering her, but he wanted her to tell him, desperately wanted her to talk. He comforted her the only way he knew how: by making love to her. He was sad, angry and he wanted whomever hurt her to run and hide.

Back then, there were no promises, no declarations of love, although he felt it and she did, too. There was just a sex pact and the strength of their burgeoning feelings. Now, it was different. They lived together; they were a couple. It would drive him crazy, not being able to make things better for her. He'd feel helpless. He'd be desperate, because she was everything to him. He would never want her to suffer. Because he loved her.

Like she loved him.

At that moment, he knew. Protecting her from his pain was causing more agony than he ever intended. He didn't mean to do it, he was a protector by nature. He was the man of his house growing up for a long time. He was the one everyone had to depend on. He couldn't be weak when they needed him. He couldn't make them worry; they had enough on their plates.

So he learned to trust himself, rely on himself and basically be an island onto himself. It was easier that way.

Until he found her.

Now, he knew with all his heart he didn't want to be alone, couldn't be alone. He needed her with a fierce passion and love; she was his peace, his solace, his love. She needed to know, but more than that, he needed to tell her.

And he needed to tell her he would try. With all his heart, he'd tell her he was sorry and he would do everything in his power to open up.

It all was crystal clear to him now. He stood up and looked at his watch. It was almost midnight. He wanted to go get her. He knew where she was, he knew the way she thought. She was at JJ's; he'd bet a million dollars on it.

He shook his head. It was too late. He was going to let her have some peace tonight. He had plans he had to accomplish in the morning before he brought her back where she belonged.

He pulled out his cell and dialed her, number one on his speed dial long before they ever dated. He wasn't surprised that she didn't answer. He left a message, short and simple. "I love you, just like you love me. And I'm grateful for it."

Then he did something he normally didn't do too well. Especially not lately.

He slept.

* * *

Penelope cried herself to sleep in JJ's guest room. When she arrived, she didn't say anything to JJ, who didn't ask. JJ just hugged her and lead her to the room. Will and Henry looked at her questioningly too, but she didn't even look at them. She was too sad to be social.

She shrugged off her outfit, pulled on her footie pajamas, and climbed into bed. She didn't bother washing her face or brushing her hair. She just wanted to lay down and cry, because her heart was that broken. Leaving someone who loved you, but didn't know how to really love, was a miserable, terrible experience.

She didn't sleep well at all. She woke up, her eyes red, her nose stuffy. She heard a knock on the door. She didn't want to see anyone. She just stayed in bed and pulled the covers over her putrid feeling head.

"Penelope, he's here," she heard JJ say from outside her door.

"Tell him to go away," she mumbled from under the covers.

She heard the door open and knew JJ had walked in.

"He looks like he did that morning in your office when you told me you were together. It's written all over his face still; he really loves you." JJ sat on the edge of the bed and pulled down her covers. "Are you sure you want to send him away?"

"Yes. I know he loves me; I love him, too." She started to cry again. "That's why he has to go and figure things out."

JJ gave her the saddest look before Pen pulled the covers up again. She felt JJ pat her, then she stood up and walked out of the room.

It took about ten more minutes before the door opened again. She was still crying under the covers. "JJ, please. Not now."

She didn't hear a sound. Moments later, a body laid down next to her in the bed and wrapped his arms around her. She'd know that familiar body anywhere. It just made her cry harder.

"Shhh," he said, pulling the covers down and kissing away her tears. "Baby, please don't cry. I have so much to say and you'll want to hear it. I promise."

She sniffled and swallowed. She truly trusted Derek, even if he didn't trust her. "Go ahead."

He smiled. She noticed he looked well rested. She slept like hell and he got a good night's sleep? She did the right thing and she got to suffer. Life stunk sometimes.

"I want you to know you were right," he started slowly. He slid his arm underneath her shoulders to pull her closer, so she was resting against his chest. She could hear the steady beat of his heart.

"About what?" she croaked out. Crying made her voice froggy.

"About everything, baby girl," he said, looking at her right in the eyes. "Everything you said was true. I do close myself off. It's a long standing bad habit I didn't even realize I was doing. I thought I was making it better by not involving you, but I was wrong."

She gave him a soft smile; it was all the encouragement he needed.

"I got a rotten past, honey. I learned to be tough, to keep everything in and everyone at bay. Had to trust me, nothing else." He smiled a little. "Except you. You were wrong about, that. I do trust you; you're one of the only people I always truly trusted. I trust you with my life and my heart. Gave it to you to protect a long time ago."

"Derek," she began warily.

"No, sweetheart. Honest," he said quickly. "I've told you things I've never told anyone in my life. You are my best friend: you know I got more baggage than a United flight and you know all my dirty secrets."

She smiled. "That I do."

"But you've always been a little more than just my friend," he said. "You were precious to me, someone I needed to protect and take care of. When Battle shot you, that magnified that feeling."

Her smile was bittersweet. "Oh, sweet cheeks."

"I felt like I failed you. Then I fell in love with you. You were my solace, my one thing good in my life. I decided you didn't need to suffer over _anything_ if I could help it."

"Honey," she said, looking up into his eyes. "Everyone suffers at some time. It's part of life. You get the negatives, but then you enjoy the positives so much better."

"I didn't want you to have to deal with the crap I've had lately." He looked at her and just blurted it out, "See, Strauss has been pushing me to move, transfer. I said no, and she's giving me jobs I don't like doing that make me absolutely sick."

"That's it?" she said, looking at him. "You didn't want me to worry about _that_?"

He grinned sheepishly. "Sounds damn stupid when you put it that way. Really, there's more to it, and-"

"Well, let's talk to Hotch and Rossi and see what they can do about-"

"Did already," he interrupted with a smile. "I just have to wait out the storm."

"Well, then," she said, a bit deflated, then she looked determined again. "Until then, you are going to let me help you, mister. Like it or not. You will let me help you, even if you just need a break to vent in the middle of the day. I will be there, bugging you all the time if you don't."

"I'd like that," he said, smiling. "I'd like you to bug me every damn day of my life for the rest of my life." He leaned down and kissed her.

She felt warm from the inside out. "I do love you."

"I love you, too," he said. "I can't say I won't screw up and bottle things inside, but I promise you I will try."

She smiled. "That's all I ask for."

"Never leave me again, woman," he said, holding her fiercely to his side. He kissed the top of her head, his voice was husky. "I don't know what I would do if I didn't have you."

"I never want to be without you either."

He grinned. "Willing to make that a binding legal contract?"

She laughed, "Screwba- oooh!"

It was hard to talk with that much diamond facing her. She blinked for a few seconds, stared at the ring, smiled, then stared at it again. Then she looked up at him.

Just looking at him, she knew JJ and her heart were both right. This man really loved her.

"Penelope," he said. "Will you marry me?"

"Of course," she said, nearly giddy with happiness.

He pulled her into his arms and kissed her with all the passion he had in him. It was a kiss filled with longing, desire and all-consuming love that was equally shared. A long while later, he pulled away. "Let's go home."

It took just a few moments for her to dress, put her stuff in her bag and show JJ her appreciation.

She gave JJ a hug. "Thank you, cupcake, for letting me crash here. And making us talk."

"No problem. I know I took a gamble letting him in, but it was obviously worth it." JJ smiled coyly at her. "Glad I did. Nice ring, by the way."

Penelope just grinned back at her.

Derek felt he owed much more to JJ. She didn't have to let him see her or answer her phone when he called this morning to check on Penelope. She was very kind and very supportive. "Thank you, JJ," he said with heartfelt gratitude.

"You know, Morgan," JJ said with a gentle smile. "A smart woman told me a long time ago to be your friend. I completely agreed with her. I hope you know that now, too."

Derek smiled at her. "Never really doubted it, JJ. Like I said, you look after my girl. That puts you very high in my book."

"Alright, enough of this mushy talk," Penelope said with a smile. "Let's go home."

Derek reached for Penelope's hand and clasped it in his large warm palm. She smiled up at him, leaning into his side. They left, strolling out, holding each other's hand the whole time.　


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11 Epilogue

_AN: Putting this out there early, folks. Thanks for the reviews; will answer as soon as I can!_

It was a beautiful wedding filled with tons of love and laughter. It happened in June in Chicago. They made Derek's mother the happiest woman on the earth. Not only did she get to have her son home that summer on vacation, she got to meet Penelope and gained her as a daughter in law. The woman beamed from ear to ear the whole week they were there.

The entire team was in attendance, along with a select group of friends and family, to make the day a complete success. Even the food, wine and music at the reception were perfect. Penelope and Derek didn't think the day could've been better.

However, they were both really looking forward to their wedding night. They were staying in one of the suites at the Four Seasons hotel overlooking Lake Michigan for the night, before getting ready to fly to Saint Barts in the morning. Derek was surprised Penelope wanted to go Caribbean for their honeymoon; she had carte blanche for choosing the destination and he was certain she'd pick Paris.

"Why Saint Barts?" He had to ask. "I thought for sure you'd pick France."

"No," she said with a wicked little grin. "You, a lot of heat, very little clothes. What could be better?"

She told him later that Saint Barts is a French and English combined exclusive island. There was no negatives about it; she'd still use her French and get to see him mostly naked the entire time.

He liked the way she thought.

By the time the wedding was over, it was rather late, but Penelope was wired. She was excited and ecstatic. The past two months were whirlwind and fantastic. Derek really did start talking to her, even about things in his past that he never mentioned. It made them even closer and it helped her understand who he was. It made her love him all the more, although she didn't think that was possible. She already loved him with all her heart.

He was a remarkable man, she thought, watching him greet and tip the room service person. She was truly fortunate. She looked over, he was getting champagne. "Dom Perignon?"

He shut the door and smirked at her. "Hell, no. I learned my lesson the first time I got that. Not sweet enough, you said."

She smiled. He paid attention to every little detail in her life.

His coat was already gone, his tie was undone around his neck, and the top few buttons of his shirt was undone. He was already bare footed, he was beginning to look much more relaxed. Derek liked the party atmosphere, but she could tell the whole day he was looking forward to it being just them.

The entire week before the wedding they stayed at his mother's house. She insisted; Derek declined, but Penelope agreed.

"You do realize that is one loud locale where we won't have one moment of privacy?" he said.

She smiled. "You can wait a week and appease your mother."

Between that, the romance of the wedding and seeing her in her strapless satin wedding gown, he was practically prowling the suite like a wildcat. His eyes were hot, dark, just barely under control. It made her just a touch nervous and very aware of him.

He stepped closer to her. "Cristal. You taught me to get Cristal, because it was sweet and bubbly, just like you."

His voice was thick, throaty, like velvet on gravel. It made the hairs on the back of her neck stand up and goose bumps run down her arms. She wondered if he knew exactly how sexy he was. Then she giggled. Of course he did.

"Unzip me, please," she said, turning her back to him. He pulled the zipper down in the back, his knuckle running down the length of her spine. It was like he couldn't be that near her without touching her in some way.

The dress pooled in a beautiful white heap at her feet. She turned again and smiled sweetly at him. "Thank you."

There was nothing sweet about what she was wearing. It was functional for what needed to be under the dress, being that it was white and had good support. However, it was entirely lace, completely see-through and pushed her breasts up so high they looked like an offering made to a pagan god.

It did what she hoped it would do. It knocked her husband completely speechless. He just stood there, staring at her, holding a bottle of the finest champagne she was sure she wouldn't get to drink at this rate. The way he was looking at her now just made her smile. She didn't feel nervous anymore.

"Aren't you going to open that?" She gestured to the bottle with an arched brow.

"In a minute," he said, his wicked grin returning before tossing the bottle on the bed.

She barely had a second to catch a breath before his hands framed her face and his mouth captured hers in a hot, wet, hungry kiss. There was nothing soft or gentle about this kiss; it was meant to ravish her, and she loved every second of it. She kissed him back with nearly the same intensity.

They made love.

She rested on his chest for a short while, before sliding slowly to his side.

"Crossed one more off the list," he said, before yawning hugely.

She looked at him quizzically.

"I _slept with a married woman_," he said. Then he snickered. "Take _that_, Rossi."

"That you did. I am guessing that you have him beat." She giggled. "I'm sure you won now."

"Of course I won," he said, smiling sleepily. "I have you."

Then he pulled her into his side, kissed her one more time, and they both fell asleep.

**Please see my profile if you want more of this chapter!**


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